I know I shouldn't pay attention to gossip but, if according to what Perez Hilton's website is now reporting, Fidel Castro has finally taken the celestial express!!!!!!
http://perezhilton.com/?p=4401
Normally, I don't think its right to speak ill of the dead... except for certain circumstances. News of Fidel's demise definitely qualifies as special circumstances! If there is any justice in heaven, right now Fidel is digging ditches in hell!
But to be nice, I will say that the one good thing he did was to give all Cuban nationals free health care. Not even the dictator to the north has granted that!
I can't even imagine the amount of partying, crying, laughing and hugging that will happen in Miami and in Cuban exile communities across the world in just a short while when the announcement is made. I hope everyone effected by Castro's horrendous policies and iron regime will Party like its 1999!
I sincerely hope that much good will come out of this. I sincerely hope this will motivate our current Bush administration legislators to change the insane law that only allows Cuban and Cuban-Americans to travel to visit relatives in Cuba..ONCE EVERY THREE YEARS! Shameful! I also hope that Cuba is NOT subjected to Castro part deux should his brother succeed him!
All in all I wish nothing but good for everyone!
Friday, August 24, 2007
Blessing in Disguise (Diary Of A Bruised Body)
They say that incidents happen in threes. So on account of my gung-ho-ness at work I managed to give myself two almost concussions and a sore finger.
I'll explain. I was at work and the Fed-Ex came to drop off a bunch of boxes. I was helping shove something onto the floor. I wasn't aware how close I was to his dolly (I think that's how its spelled!) ...just like that I lifted my head up and SMACK! went my forehead on pure metal.
All I could utter was 'OW..ow..owie...ow'! The Fed-Ex was smirking/giggling. Who can blame him? If that was me watching instead of getting injured, I would have laughed too! I tried to laugh it off but the second he left the room, I was still groaning and feeling the new bump that was sure to make me look like a dunce if I didn't get the swelling down fast.
I proceeded to the kitchen to the first aid kit on the wall. Who happens to be there talking to someone whilst I struggled with the kit hooks? My supervisor. Who is really nice and ask if everything was fine. "Of course! Just a small injury". (It wasn't). My head was really smarting.
I put ice on it for 10 minutes. Duty calls and I went down to the loading dock to help a delivery guy with a large shipment of stuff.
Remember Groundhog's Day with Bill Murray? I didn't even feel deja vu when I accidentally got smacked in the side of the head with a box the delivery guy was lifting. All I felt was a dull sensation of pain. Pain and "Uh oh, I hurt...again". Tear.
No time to cry because getting anything up from the loading dock is a pain and takes time. So I just had to pretend to shake it off.
Except I was getting seriously concerned that I might have REALLY given myself a concussion! With no health insurance, I have no choice but to suffer (not in silence because I think later I realized I told like 10 people that my head hurts). Time is money. No money means no rent. No rent means no SF. No SF means....you get the picture.
This is when the third smackdown occurs (well, wrenching is more like it). I was helping the delivery guy to maneuver the crate into the elevator. He was pushing forward while I was trying to push book back from getting stuck in the elevator door. My ring got caught between the wood and the elevator and LITERALLY GOT RIPPED OFF MY FINGER.
I was in shock when I looked down. And the delivery guy kept saying I'm sorry. I was adult about it. No use crying over spilled ring. The saddest part about it was not my extremely sore (hopefully not sprained!) finger is that I bought that ring over two years ago and it is my favorite! I wear it everyday and only take it off around water.
But that ring incident turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Better my ring ripped apart than my finger! Because that is exactly would have happened if my ring hadn't been there! And that would be far worse because it would have hurt and bled like hell and put me out of work until it healed. So I wouldn't be able to work...period! That would be terrible because in order to survive in San Francisco and keep my apartment and pay my bills, I NEED TO HAVE A JOB AND EARN A LIVING!!!! My hands (all ten fingers included) ARE IMPORTANT!!!
Luckily, the ring was torn open in such a way that it will be easy to weld it back together. I'll try to get it fixed this weekend.
I ended up going home after work and icing my wounds to numbness.
To top it off, I got an email from a former friend that basically says that we should get over our differences and be buddies again. I almost considered it. Then I decided to look at some old emails the friend sent me that were quite nasty and vindictive. A smile came to my face because it hit me that again that most bad incidents are blessings in disguises. I don't always need a smack in the forehead to know when to take a hint!
I'll explain. I was at work and the Fed-Ex came to drop off a bunch of boxes. I was helping shove something onto the floor. I wasn't aware how close I was to his dolly (I think that's how its spelled!) ...just like that I lifted my head up and SMACK! went my forehead on pure metal.
All I could utter was 'OW..ow..owie...ow'! The Fed-Ex was smirking/giggling. Who can blame him? If that was me watching instead of getting injured, I would have laughed too! I tried to laugh it off but the second he left the room, I was still groaning and feeling the new bump that was sure to make me look like a dunce if I didn't get the swelling down fast.
I proceeded to the kitchen to the first aid kit on the wall. Who happens to be there talking to someone whilst I struggled with the kit hooks? My supervisor. Who is really nice and ask if everything was fine. "Of course! Just a small injury". (It wasn't). My head was really smarting.
I put ice on it for 10 minutes. Duty calls and I went down to the loading dock to help a delivery guy with a large shipment of stuff.
Remember Groundhog's Day with Bill Murray? I didn't even feel deja vu when I accidentally got smacked in the side of the head with a box the delivery guy was lifting. All I felt was a dull sensation of pain. Pain and "Uh oh, I hurt...again". Tear.
No time to cry because getting anything up from the loading dock is a pain and takes time. So I just had to pretend to shake it off.
Except I was getting seriously concerned that I might have REALLY given myself a concussion! With no health insurance, I have no choice but to suffer (not in silence because I think later I realized I told like 10 people that my head hurts). Time is money. No money means no rent. No rent means no SF. No SF means....you get the picture.
This is when the third smackdown occurs (well, wrenching is more like it). I was helping the delivery guy to maneuver the crate into the elevator. He was pushing forward while I was trying to push book back from getting stuck in the elevator door. My ring got caught between the wood and the elevator and LITERALLY GOT RIPPED OFF MY FINGER.
I was in shock when I looked down. And the delivery guy kept saying I'm sorry. I was adult about it. No use crying over spilled ring. The saddest part about it was not my extremely sore (hopefully not sprained!) finger is that I bought that ring over two years ago and it is my favorite! I wear it everyday and only take it off around water.
But that ring incident turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Better my ring ripped apart than my finger! Because that is exactly would have happened if my ring hadn't been there! And that would be far worse because it would have hurt and bled like hell and put me out of work until it healed. So I wouldn't be able to work...period! That would be terrible because in order to survive in San Francisco and keep my apartment and pay my bills, I NEED TO HAVE A JOB AND EARN A LIVING!!!! My hands (all ten fingers included) ARE IMPORTANT!!!
Luckily, the ring was torn open in such a way that it will be easy to weld it back together. I'll try to get it fixed this weekend.
I ended up going home after work and icing my wounds to numbness.
To top it off, I got an email from a former friend that basically says that we should get over our differences and be buddies again. I almost considered it. Then I decided to look at some old emails the friend sent me that were quite nasty and vindictive. A smile came to my face because it hit me that again that most bad incidents are blessings in disguises. I don't always need a smack in the forehead to know when to take a hint!
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Love is a funny thing...
Usually, at some point during the month I start reflecting back on my past relationships. It then occurs to me that I have had none. Do I consider myself lacking? fortunate? Most times I feel a combination of both.
My sole problem is trust. When you haven't had a healthy basic foundation for trust established when you were young, nor maintained when you were an adolescent, it leaves one in a bit of a limbo. I'm quite social but I don't maintain any romantic relationships because I have this underlying suspicion that whomever I date is ultimately going... to disappoint the living hell out of me.
High standards? You bet. I consider my heart too important to be trifled with. But in cutting myself off from taking the chance of being disappointed and getting hurt, I am in turn only hurting myself.
I guess what disappoints me the most is when I meet a guy that I would consider dating seriously. And usually, as though fates love to joke at a humans' expense, THE GUY HAS ABSOLUTELY NO INTEREST IN ME.
It is always crushing. But I find I'm getting used to not getting what I want. I'm starting to realize that everything takes practice and that slowly but surely I am taking the baby steps needed to let true love into my life. And the only way to do that is to love yourself!
Loving yourself to me means: forgiving myself for not being superwoman, being vulnerable sometimes (even when you feel like its cracking your hardened exterior put out to the world everyday). Acknowledging that you are beautiful, sexy and have a wonderful mind. That you are kinder then you give yourself credit for. That you are dependable even though you are late more times than you can count. That it is okay to make mistakes because there is always a lesson to be learned from them; its called LIVING. And last, but not least, that you deserve happiness and whatever good things that come your way!
I'm on a slow journey to loving myself completely. But I'm making progress and that is a great thing. Anything worth wanting is worth working for. Loving myself is definitely worth it for me!
My sole problem is trust. When you haven't had a healthy basic foundation for trust established when you were young, nor maintained when you were an adolescent, it leaves one in a bit of a limbo. I'm quite social but I don't maintain any romantic relationships because I have this underlying suspicion that whomever I date is ultimately going... to disappoint the living hell out of me.
High standards? You bet. I consider my heart too important to be trifled with. But in cutting myself off from taking the chance of being disappointed and getting hurt, I am in turn only hurting myself.
I guess what disappoints me the most is when I meet a guy that I would consider dating seriously. And usually, as though fates love to joke at a humans' expense, THE GUY HAS ABSOLUTELY NO INTEREST IN ME.
It is always crushing. But I find I'm getting used to not getting what I want. I'm starting to realize that everything takes practice and that slowly but surely I am taking the baby steps needed to let true love into my life. And the only way to do that is to love yourself!
Loving yourself to me means: forgiving myself for not being superwoman, being vulnerable sometimes (even when you feel like its cracking your hardened exterior put out to the world everyday). Acknowledging that you are beautiful, sexy and have a wonderful mind. That you are kinder then you give yourself credit for. That you are dependable even though you are late more times than you can count. That it is okay to make mistakes because there is always a lesson to be learned from them; its called LIVING. And last, but not least, that you deserve happiness and whatever good things that come your way!
I'm on a slow journey to loving myself completely. But I'm making progress and that is a great thing. Anything worth wanting is worth working for. Loving myself is definitely worth it for me!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
OMG! The future is upon us....
So, I realized today that I haven't updated my blog in over a month. I was so keen to start writing about my life in San Francisco and all the things that I see and experience every day. I had gathered all these articles because I wanted to write how I felt about how I felt about the whole debate on immigration (and how hypocritical I think many who oppose immigration are).
I think what happened is that I overextended myself in other areas of my life and as a result I lost focus on what I have to say. I was too busy worrying (stressing more like) over a temp-to-hire job (which I didn't get :), paying rent and just life in general.
So my focus slipped and now I've finally remembered what I wanted to say.
The future. It is a funny thing indeed. We are given no hint of what to come; even thought out predictions can fail to actualize. What I've failed to accept (even today I am struggling with it...) is that we have no real control of the future; there are too many outside forces that overwhelm the abilities of a single individual.
The only card we as individuals have to play is free choice. We have a choice in the decisions we make for ourselves. Nothing else. No matter how painful or scary it may seem we have to go forward with whatever decisions we choose to make. Whether it works out in our favor or not. Shit happens to everyone.
The thing I value the most out of any decision I've made it is that there is always a lesson to be learned from it. In retrospect, I can always say that everything happens for a reason; even when I don't understand it at the time. I grow from my lessons.
Enough ruminating from me for today. I've got a nasty cold and need to get some sleep before tomorrow!
I think what happened is that I overextended myself in other areas of my life and as a result I lost focus on what I have to say. I was too busy worrying (stressing more like) over a temp-to-hire job (which I didn't get :), paying rent and just life in general.
So my focus slipped and now I've finally remembered what I wanted to say.
The future. It is a funny thing indeed. We are given no hint of what to come; even thought out predictions can fail to actualize. What I've failed to accept (even today I am struggling with it...) is that we have no real control of the future; there are too many outside forces that overwhelm the abilities of a single individual.
The only card we as individuals have to play is free choice. We have a choice in the decisions we make for ourselves. Nothing else. No matter how painful or scary it may seem we have to go forward with whatever decisions we choose to make. Whether it works out in our favor or not. Shit happens to everyone.
The thing I value the most out of any decision I've made it is that there is always a lesson to be learned from it. In retrospect, I can always say that everything happens for a reason; even when I don't understand it at the time. I grow from my lessons.
Enough ruminating from me for today. I've got a nasty cold and need to get some sleep before tomorrow!
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Nosy People
Normally, I'm an even tempered person. I don't really get upset without reason (I'm sure somewhere, I have friends going "Right....."). My reaction to this incident may have been the result of her rudeness, my sensitivity. Or it could have been..... because I was STARVING. And we all know, that hunger makes you cranky!
So, I was standing at the bus stop today, minding my own business, waiting to go home. I started unwrapping this leftover portion of a falafel from lunch on monday. I was starving! But in the process of revealing my golden nugget, this older woman standing next to me, turns to me to say:
"Excuse Me. But do you know that there is no eating allowed on the bus?'
"Yeah. That's why I'm taking a bite now."
She turned away and almost immediately began a conversation with another lady next to her who was into knitting.
However, the entire time, only one thought(s) kept running through my head:
"Hey, fuck you lady! Do I look fucking retarded?! I take the bus every day! Don't you think I know that I'm not supposed to eat on there?! You see me every fucking M-F and do you see me eating on the bus??? NOOOOOOO!"
So step off Bitch!
I felt kinda bad for calling this older lady a bitch so late in the day. She seemed like a relatively decent, composed woman who was well dressed.
But that didn't give her any right to but in where her opinion wasn't wanted and wasn't solicited.
Besides, why did she care so much? It was only a freaking falafel!!!!
So, I was standing at the bus stop today, minding my own business, waiting to go home. I started unwrapping this leftover portion of a falafel from lunch on monday. I was starving! But in the process of revealing my golden nugget, this older woman standing next to me, turns to me to say:
"Excuse Me. But do you know that there is no eating allowed on the bus?'
"Yeah. That's why I'm taking a bite now."
She turned away and almost immediately began a conversation with another lady next to her who was into knitting.
However, the entire time, only one thought(s) kept running through my head:
"Hey, fuck you lady! Do I look fucking retarded?! I take the bus every day! Don't you think I know that I'm not supposed to eat on there?! You see me every fucking M-F and do you see me eating on the bus??? NOOOOOOO!"
So step off Bitch!
I felt kinda bad for calling this older lady a bitch so late in the day. She seemed like a relatively decent, composed woman who was well dressed.
But that didn't give her any right to but in where her opinion wasn't wanted and wasn't solicited.
Besides, why did she care so much? It was only a freaking falafel!!!!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Save a Tree, Start a Blog (Just Kidding)
So this is my first blog posting.!Its weird because I can't believe I waited this long to do something that is really quite simple! I'd like to thank my good friend Kathryn for encouraging me to post my thoughts and ideas in an open place.
I guess the foremost thought on my mind is: what a difference a year can make. I'm in a completely different place than I was last year (litterally and figuratively). I think what I'm feeling is something akin to the realization of happiness. To what degree, varies from day to day. But it lingers and its growing stronger. I hope that it will propel me to try new things. I also want to...well, I want a lot of things. And things (good and bad) come to you in due time.
I have to go grocery shopping but I will be back to post something tomorrow. To anyone reading this, I hope you enjoy the rest of your Sunday!
I guess the foremost thought on my mind is: what a difference a year can make. I'm in a completely different place than I was last year (litterally and figuratively). I think what I'm feeling is something akin to the realization of happiness. To what degree, varies from day to day. But it lingers and its growing stronger. I hope that it will propel me to try new things. I also want to...well, I want a lot of things. And things (good and bad) come to you in due time.
I have to go grocery shopping but I will be back to post something tomorrow. To anyone reading this, I hope you enjoy the rest of your Sunday!
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